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16 October 2014

calumannabel


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Paparazzi frenzy as Fiscal orders Lewis Socialite back to jail.

There was a media frenzy on Bayhead yesterday as a tractor taking local bed and breakfast heiress Paris Morrison passed by the ferry terminal. The Fios Crime reporter, Dolina Spraid Porter, strained her ankle in the frenzy and had to have it bandaged when she got back to school.
Paris Morrison, daughter of Conrad and Mary Anne, is no stranger to the pages of the Gazette and the Free Press. She has been dubbed the 'Wild Child of Skigersta'. Last month she was caught driving on the Barvas Moors in contravention of a ban imposed earlier this year. She was sentenced to twenty eight days at the Plasterfield Township House of Correction. Here in her tartan jumpsuit she could expect to earn six pounds a week chopping and packing neeps for the Trondra market.
However following an examination by her first cousin, Angus 'Freud' Morrison, she was released to complete her sentence at her parents' luxury B and B on Oliver's Brae. There followed an outcry from the West Side and Back districts and the Fiscal demanded she be brought back to court to explain how this psychiatric report came to be done by her first cousin.
In a packed court, Paris, the face of Emporioalanjohn of Lionel, looked radiant but tired as the fiscal remanded her. 'This is an opportunity from God' she told the Monthly Record. 'I certainly expect to emerge a changed woman. Three weeks in Plasterfield will be a humbling experience.' Her cousin, Chrissie Mary Morrison (Ms), age witheld, when doorstepped by reporters promised her cousin a getting out thrash to remember at Eoropie Bochan. We Morrisons are just easy targets for the press she added as she threw a bucket of sour milk over the assembled press pack in a gesture of family solidarity.
Posted on calumannabel at 23:07

Comments

Surely there must be a photograph? Did Chrissie Mary sour the milk herself?

Flying Cat from in disbelief


like FC ,I would like to have a photograph of the poor girl, oh these teenagers of the western isles---

carol from dying with laughter


Chrissie Mary would only publish were the photos to be sponsored by a manufacturer of sour milk able to meet the hefty demands that any Morrison places on such deals.

calumannabel from sponsored by 'I can't believe it's not guga'


Are your Morrisons related to the supermarket Morrisons (Lord Ken)? If so, you would probably get a discount on your sour milk and other supplies...

Jill from EK


Morrisons only sell sour milk by accident rather than design and we don't speak to our Uncle Ken anyway after what he said at cousin Ina's funeral

calumannabel from Ate till Late last night.


At least we've been spared that awful Bangkok Hilton and the local wannabe Milan Caberfeidh.

Annie B from the usual


I wondered what she did for a living...

Flying Cat from Anorak Towers Best Western


Where have ye gan Calum? You've gone very quiet. Are you alright?

reader from missing Calum


Dear Reader Been busy completing some writing assignments but will be back in the saddle soon. Thanks for your kind enquiry

calumannabel from Nose to the grindstone




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