91�ȱ�

91�ȱ� > Tips and advice > Routines

There are lots of practical tips and tricks to help you get your little one out of nappies and into pants – and good communication is key, says Alina Lynden, Communications Manager at

“We tend to assume potty training will go naturally because it’s a bodily function, but it takes time and can be stressful. Communication is very important at all stages; things can go wrong, so it’s a good idea to make it as relaxed and as fun as possible.”

The first thing to remember is that every child is different, adds Alina. “They learn to walk and talk at different times and learn how to use the toilet at different times too. However, most children are ready to be potty trained between 18 months and 3 years old.”

1. Start chatting about wee and poo early (even if you feel uncomfortable)

It’s never too early to start talking to your children about wee and poo, says Alina. “You might feel squeamish but they need to know that it’s a natural thing that we all do, so starting building it into your everyday chats, particularly when you’re nappy changing.”

And be positive. “This starts with avoiding any phrases like dirty and smelly because you don’t want your child to associate the toilet with anything negative. Say ‘oh look you’ve done a poo’ rather than ‘yuck, your nappy is stinky’.”

If they have a younger sibling, maybe they can help with their nappy changes.

2. Prepare your child

Help your child feel comfortable with the idea of their bodily functions and the potty too, says Alina. “Read picture books about potty training together and have a potty in the house you can use for role play with teddies.”

Remember that young children learn by watching and copying, which means you may have to leave any inhibitions at the toilet door. “Show them you do wees and poos too: leave the toilet door open and ask family members to do the same,” says Alina. “Keep nappies in the toilet and change your child in there, so they associate wees and poos with that room. And when they’re a little older, get them involved with changing their nappies: change them standing up, get them to help with their clothing and clean your hands together afterwards.”

And plan a reward system early on, adds Alina. “It could be a sticker chart or lucky dip bag that celebrates every little step towards potty training, like getting dressed or washing their hands.”

3. Watch for signs they’re ready

“If you’ve already talked to your child about wee and poo then they should feel comfortable with the subject, and in tune with the signals,” says Alina.

“Physical signs include your child passing soft poo at around the same time every day, being able to hold their wee for about 90 minutes to two hours and being able to sit down on the potty and get back up again,” explains Alina.

And showing an awareness that they’ve done a wee or poo. “When they start to notice, it means they’re beginning to recognise the signals their body is giving them,” explains Alina. Try the to help them understand the difference between being wet and dry. “This is where you put a sheet of folded-up kitchen roll in their nappy, which lets your child experience a wet feeling. They don’t get this with super-absorbent nappies, plus it gives you a chance to see how long they can stay dry for,” explains Alina.

Bringing poo and wee into normal family conversation can help them to understand their body. “For example, prime pooing time for the body is 20 to 30 minutes after a meal. So, after they’ve had lunch say something like: ‘Let’s go and sit on the potty and see if there’s a poo there.’”

4. … but make sure you’re ready too

Potty training needs to happen at a time that’s good for you too. But when’s a good time? “Basically, when you can devote lots of time and effort to it,” says Alina. “If you’re moving house or there’s a new baby on the way, it’s probably not ideal.”

“It's tough because parents have very busy lives. But the more pressure there is, the less likely it's going to go well because the key thing about releasing wee and poo is that you need to feel relaxed. And if you’re feeling stressed-out and angry, it’s not the best environment for your child.”

5. Talk openly with other adults in your life

Consistency and routine are key, so it’s really important that all the adults in your little one’s life are on the same page, says Alina.

“Once you’ve decided that it’s the right time, then talk to everyone who your child spends time with and let them know where you’re up to with potty training. Whether your child spends time with your in-laws, they’ve started at nursery or they stay with their dad at weekends, everyone needs to give your child a consistent message.”

Get them onboard with your reward chart, ask them to use the same words like wee or pee and follow the same routine. “The other benefit of chatting to all these people is that they can support you too: there will be times you need to call in help,” adds Alina.

6. Be positive

“It’s not something you can do overnight and there will be accidents but it’s really important to remember – through all the ups and downs – that once you've done it, it's amazing,” says Alina.

When there’s poo squished into the carpet, you’re unlikely to feel particularly upbeat. “Try not to make a fuss about these incidents. Be prepared for them and remember that the whole thing about accidents is that this is how kids learn.”

To keep your child motivated, praise every achievement and use humour. “Kids naturally find poo and wee funny, so tap into that to lighten the mood,” says Alina. “Children love animals, so you could talk about their toilet habits. Singing and games around potty training are also a great idea. It’ll help your children feel calmer and laughing also helps us physically by engaging the muscles we need to push a poo out.”

7. Tailor your approach

“Children with a disability or additional needs can’t always communicate their thoughts and feelings, so to tell you when they’re ready to potty train,” explains Alina. “The vast majority of children can be toilet trained; it just might take a bit longer sometimes. The important thing is to support potty training with the signs, sounds or words that your child can use and understand and let their bladder and bowel readiness lead the way. Use to help.”

8. Plan well for night-time training

Staying positive is key once again. Do some preparation together and watch for signs of readiness, says Alina. “They might wake up dry or have a lighter nappy. They might also ask not to wear a bedtime nappy or take it off during the night. Or wake you up in the night to ask to help them go to the loo.”

Keep chatting openly. “Explain to them what they’ll need to do in the night once they’re no longer wearing a nappy. Try simple things like placing a potty in their bedroom and encourage them to practise getting from their bed to it. Putting a gentle night light by the bed will make it easier for them to find their way. And be ready for accidents: have fresh pyjamas and bedding ready.”

If you are worried about night-time wetting, check out our advice from an early year's educator on when to speak to your GP.

9. Ignore the myths… and pressures

There are lots of myths around potty training that are best ignored. “A common one is that boys are harder to potty train than girls. It comes up a lot but there’s no evidence to show it’s true,” says Alina.

And try not to feel pressured by other parents’ potty-training boasts. “Focus on your child and remember that you know them better than anyone else.”

Visit more tips and resources on potty training.

In case you missed it