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Many three year olds are starting nursery for the first time this week, so Kaye asks - is it better to stay and get your kids settled in on the first days of nursery and school, or tough out the tears and tantrums and make a sharp exit? Is it too traumatic for children to leave them crying in a new environment, or is it actually better for them not to draw out the separation process? And are parents guilty of sometimes making matters worse?