Not a day for romantics
There are many traditional ways to begin Valentine's Day - breakfast in bed for your loved one, a rose petal-strewn bath, an over-priced hand-made card.
Slightly more unusual is to scarper at dawn in order to have breakfast with two front-row forwards and a man called Grans in a Harvester just off the A48 outside Cardiff.
Such is the happy nature of a Six Nations road-trip. Having posted a blog last week asking for a lift to Cardiff with some England fans, the time-honoured day of romance began for me in the company of Damo (tight-head prop), Julian (hooker/prop) and the afore-mentioned Grans (second row, from the look of him).
I count myself fortunate for several reasons. Firstly, a man called Mad Jon was a late pull-out. Secondly, the chaps are splendid company. Thirdly, at least I've actually made it to the match.
Little did the Six Nations organisers realise the problems they would cause when they scheduled the Wales v England clash for 14 February.
Fellow fan Martin, nailed on for a spot in the Passat just 24 hours before, had his day-pass revoked by a fuming Mrs Martin late last night.
As his hopes went up in smoke, so did his mate Mike's. "If he's not going, why should you?" was the drift. A friend of Damo's isn't even being allowed out of the house.
It's a shame. Apart from missing out on some amusing recollections from Damo on previous trips to Cardiff - spontaneous cheese-eating contests, misguided attempts to kiss - they'll be missing the most hotly-anticipated match of the tournament so far.
But not everyone, it seems, can appreciate the romance of this famous old fixture. In households up and down the country, the following sort of conversations have been reported between fans and partners:
LADYFRIEND: "So what are we doing on Valentine's Day? Romantic walk? Posh meal? A weekend away?"
MAN-FAN: "The last one. Sort of. I'm going to Cardiff to watch Wales-England."
L: "What? Rugby? On Valentine's Day?" (scary pause) "Why?"
MF (nervously): "Ah, that's when the game is."
L: "On Valentine's Day? That's ridiculous. Can't you get them to do it on a different day?"
MF: (Pauses, runs imaginary scene through head where he attempts to phone W Gatland and M Johnson and requests match to be brought forward to Thursday): "It's a big ask."
L: "Well, what time will you be home? At least we can go out for a meal in the evening."
MF: "Ah, early hours Sunday. At best. It's a 5.30pm kick-off, so..."
L: "WHAT?
MF: "It's not my fault - they decided ages ago."
L: "Well, you'll just have to get them to play earlier."
MF: "Another big ask."
L: "Can't they start at 10am?"
MF: "Erm..."
For Wales fans, there's genuine hope of a to avenge the 60-26 humiliation in the corresponding fixture at Twickenham 11 years ago.
Even the bookies have the home side as 1/5 favourites, eyebrow-raising odds for a two-horse race.
For England fans, there's a phlegmatic feeling of resignation, with just a small glimmer of optimism that something miraculous might happen.
Maybe the Welsh line-out will be shaky again. Maybe the loss of the talismanic Shane Williams will rattle the hosts. Maybe it'll be like the World Cup quarter-final against Australia 16 months ago, when a written-off England somehow ground out a old-fashioned win over a much-favoured, far more expansive opponent.
Then there's the stats. Since the Six Nations began, England have scored twice as many points in this fixture as Wales - 290 to 144. Of the 117 encounters between the two, England still have the edge - even if it's just by one win, 53 to 52.
Hell, England are even on top of this season's Six Nations table, even if they can hardly be described as sitting pretty after that ghastly performance against Italy.
Who will end the day broken-hearted? Let's see how the fling works out.
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Comment number 1.
At 14th Feb 2009, ShahenshahG wrote:Not a big rugby fan but was interested in the title so here I am.
I always find the best way to get rid of your girl for a day is to get your mate to ring your other mate who is with you at the time and make death threats. Then you tell your girl that you know the guy making death threats and you are going to go chat to him and calm him down.
What also helps but isnt necessary - is growing your hair and beard for 4 weeks prior (making sure your neighbours and all see you) and visiting the barbers before the match. This is just a precaution just in case you get put on the telly during the match.
Excekllent blog - you might make a egg chaser out of me yet!
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Comment number 2.
At 14th Feb 2009, welshlittlebear wrote:Very funny blog. Mrs Martin has it all wrong though and I felt empassioned to give her a few tips.
Now, to qualify as a rugby widow, your rugby loving man must desert you on the most romantic day of the year, Feb 14th. However, rather than throwing my toys out of the pram and causing a big row when the Wales England date was announced, I sat back calmly and thought over my cuppa of the consequences of this event. After a few brief moments, I announced with joy - 'that sounds lovely darling, you go off for the day and night, catch up with your uni curry club friends from years gone by, go and have your facepainted and watch the game. Sounds like a lovely day out. No no, don't worry about me, I understand, I will put tea up for you when you roll in at whatever time you like'. A sheepish boyfriend then quietly gave thanks to his lord and scuttled away to leave me in piece.
So here we are, the big day has arrived, I have the house to myself and the heating is on. A very guilty feeling boyfriend treated me to an expensive dinner and bubbly last night (all a surprise) , and a breakfast in bed this morning. I have had a card and lovely flowers. I am being taken to the cinema tomorrow night. I am also being taken to Paris in two weeks (albeit for the rugby of course!!), but a few days away all the same. Now, if that doesn't spell a fantastic valentines day, i'm not sure what is. A man free house with chocolate and gifts- or a sulking man who has been banned from going to the rugby...thankfully I have the first option, and i'm just about to watch a movie. heaven! (good luck Wales!)
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Comment number 3.
At 14th Feb 2009, welshlittlebear wrote:Very funny blog. Mrs Martin has it all wrong though and I felt empassioned to give her a few tips.
Now, to qualify as a rugby widow, your rugby loving man must desert you on the most romantic day of the year, Feb 14th. However, rather than throwing my toys out of the pram and causing a big row when the Wales England date was announced, I sat back calmly and thought over my cuppa of the consequences of this event. After a few brief moments, I announced with joy - 'that sounds lovely darling, you go off for the day and night, catch up with your uni curry club friends from years gone by, go and have your facepainted and watch the game. Sounds like a lovely day out. No no, don't worry about me, I understand, I will put tea up for you when you roll in at whatever time you like'. A sheepish boyfriend then quietly gave thanks to his lord and scuttled away to leave me in peace.
So here we are, the big day has arrived, I have the house to myself and the heating is on. A very guilty feeling boyfriend treated me to an expensive dinner and bubbly last night (all a surprise) , and a breakfast in bed this morning. I have had a card and lovely flowers. I am being taken to the cinema tomorrow night. I am also being taken to Paris in two weeks (albeit for the rugby of course!!), but a few days away all the same. Now, if that doesn't spell a fantastic valentines day, i'm not sure what is. A man free house with chocolate and gifts- or a sulking man who has been banned from going to the rugby...thankfully I have the first option, and i'm just about to watch a movie. heaven! (good luck Wales!)
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Comment number 4.
At 14th Feb 2009, dougnutcity wrote:Good Blog but one question
Why is it under FOOTBALL and not RUGBY UNION???
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Comment number 5.
At 14th Feb 2009, 17eIvIoN wrote:Brilliant game, massive improvement for England, but unfortunate Sackey didn't get a 2nd try, but we outscored Wales in tries and eventually we'll start to win more.
However the 91Èȱ¬ coverage was appauling today, Brian Moore doesn't know how many minutes a Sin Bin is, as do the rest of the 91Èȱ¬ team. "oh there down to 10 men now" (wrong sport Brian) "Well now There down to 14 men for 15 mins" (wrong amount of time Brian), John Inverdale: "Well its difficult to play with 14 for 60mins" Well it would be but we only played with 14 for 20mins.
91Èȱ¬ pull finger out
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Comment number 6.
At 14th Feb 2009, osian wrote:The true welsh fan should have realised that this historic fixture was on the 14th and should have given his partner such a Diwrnod Santes Dwynwen (25 January) that she didn't give a hoot about Valentine's Day.
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