91Èȱ¬

The car scrappage scheme gets off to a flying start!

Good grief! How much gold are they expecting to steal this time?

Look out, lads, here comes Evel Knievel

Never has so much rust been gathered in one place at one time.

You were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!

Keep moving lads, she's a traffic warden.

Ford workers arrive at Dagenham

Lavinia had misunderstood the invitation to "Come in a mini," and had put her shortest skirt on

The new 'Minis only' lane on the motorway seemed to cause a bit of a tailback

The latest efforts to cure Jeremy Clarkson's insomnia were thus far proving ineffective.....

The car's designer had resulted in the Mini's catchphrase of "Issigonis tart?"

An MP needs some help returning all the Minis he bought on expenses.

The ruddy car transporter broke down!

Everyone was waiting for the signal that the Mini Dominoes was about to start

Everyone was waiting for the signal that the Mini Dominoes was about to start

This was not what Sue had in mind when she succeeded in her application to handle mini crocodiles at the zoo.

Policewoman Kendall searched every car for hidden gold and never even realised Charlie Croker was stealing minis this time

At the front, Jerry hoped all the other Minis had the optional extra of brakes

They were all there with two notable exceptions, Minnehaha and Minnie Mouse.

Are you really the only one who can afford a Sat Nav?

This North American tribe had the most unusual totem pole

Formula One budget cap revised again.

Queen unveils updated Trooping of the Colour plans.

As they sold the 150th. in an hour, British Leyland began to suspect they were selling the Mini too cheaply

Sorry, guys, but you got it wrong - it was meant to be skirts

The Self Preservation Society started off on its annual picnic

The cabinet were amazed to find their MINIsterial cars outside the commons

"The pallbearers for Chrysler and GM have arrived."

The downturn has caused some slight changes to this year's Indy 500...

'The budget cap has clearly taken affect as the teams line up for the new F1 season'

The original name for the car was the Mini Miner, but Margaret Thatcher objected to the name and got it changed

Darling launches his 'CAR FOR THE PEOPLE'

Too much dosh and not enough tact #34: You cannot decide on a colour so you get one of each

All Britain's MPs turn up singing "The Self-Preservation Society"

James apologised for the tailback, but explained that his "little Bessie" had been stuck in 2nd gear since 1987..

The Italian Job lot

"And if we don't finish Donnington Park in time for the 2010 GP, this is how it'll look in 2011"...

The clowns would ariive under separate cover

It was strange, thought Fred in the first car, you didn't normally have to queue up for leaded fuel

Jenny found level 8 of the new 3D Frogger experience particularly difficult

The Mini was very much like the present government, expensive to maintain, pricey to run, out dated and clapped out.

The clowns would arrive under separate cover
spelling

Q - What's worse than being stuck behind a Mini towing a caravan?

A - Being stuck behind a Mini towing thirteen other Minis.

MP apologises for claiming for 'small car collection'

Traffic warden: The name's Bean, B-E-A-N

"I say, let's make a rally out of this," said Monty and Carlo in the first car

I knew I should never have bought this car off Coco at Chipperfield's - the doors won't even fall off

'Daphne, I think we need to tell your family we need to spend some time alone occasionally...'

I was driving an old Mini.. Can't be that hard to find..

Steady on, wait until we're out of her sight before you start waving the checkered flag, over.

Britain's new motorway policy of 'a lane for each make of car' was at least neater, thought Vanessa.

British Leyland made a new car today - if it's a success, they might consider building another one tomorrow

As the old saying goes, "Morris less"

At the end of the working day, the gnomes all leave the Chelsea Flower Show

"We're not jokes, we're little minis folks, why does everybody laugh at us?"!!

They were only 50 yet come monday morning they'd already started queing for their pensions

After the Smart car comes the Stupid car

The Weebles arrive for work at Hamley's

Out-of-work moat cleaners protest outside Parliament.

British Leyland reveal their new Mini Tommy Cooper, just like that!

Someone had done a very poor job of ordering flags for everyone.

So, we fit new door handles and a go-faster stripe, and we call it the Tata Nano

Michael Jacksons tour manager admits that the 5 day delay in Jackos comeback might, in some part, be due to him hiring the wrong vehicles to transport his makeup

'No Desmond, they think you know where the parking places are'

The new Mini was a bit worried about in-breeding in his family tree...

"You've obviously misunderstood what we meant by measuring 0 to 60"

Sue the steward had experienced deja vu before, but this was ridiculous!

Are England playing Italy at Turin again?

Which way to the Underground?

Mandy had to accept that unless she showed a bit of leg she was never going to get a lift.

But originality was not the strongest trait in the family...

Joanna Lumley also insisted on a Mini for every Gurkha

This years rally broke all records for spectator attendance.

MOD cuts meant the Red Arrows had to practice at a slower pace and a much lower altitude; they kept the runway as a reminder though...

But our MP insists he keeps ducks in them

Orange mini had been sent to the back of the line for being too loud.

How many minis does it take to change a warden?

And people thought removing road markings would cause chaos.

Gerald, owner of "Mini Bumpers 'R' Us", smiled as he hit the brakes...

The conveyor belt on the new series of the Generation Game was on a far grander scale than before, yet still got slated for it's lack of difficulty!

Remember, we're unique, just like everyone else.

The French film industry arranges to chauffeur visiting stars around the festival in tin Cannes

"What do you mean you're going to be late? Sally Traffic has only reported a mini queue to join the M25."

The suspect was last seen driving a blue mini. Why do you ask?

No, no, no. It was supposed to be fifty clowns in ONE mini.

British Leyland announce a joint venture with Volkswagen - the Mini Golf

Yippee Kay Yay, Sir Alec

My other car is a Porsche.

Are we nearly there yet?

Illegal Immigrants will try anything to get through customs.

On the day that the voice of Mickey Mouse died, a Mini procession seemed strangely apt...

The self preservation society take a day out to Clacton on sea.

The 'Self-Preservation Society' reunion was a roaring success...

....and in the constructors championship, BMC still lead Ferrari, McLaren, and Renault for longevity...

Replacement for the second home allowance?

Little Britain

The steering on the Mini was so imprecise, not one of them actually hit the traffic warden

There are long queues at Dover, after somebody discovers a huge cache of Mini sparea in Calais

A New "Mini Adventure" begins...

All of the mothers driving that day had a low salary, in fact the Mini-mum wage