Cascada - 'Evacuate The Dancefloor'
This is not a good week to be trying to make an impact in the singles chart. I don't want to give away any secrets about who is where in the mid-week charts so far - and indeed I won't - but let's just say that some new releases are doing OK against the sudden onslaught of Michael Jackson songs, and some are not.
What you would be well advised to do, in fact, is listen to this week's chart rundown - Sunday afternoon, 4:00pm, Radio 1, as well you know - with the idea that anyone who has managed to outsell a Michael Jackson song this week has probably reached the equivalent of a Madonna-level of chart success on any other week, and should therefore be treated as some kind of musical royalty - a stand-in King of Pop, if you like.
As I said, nothing will be revealed here, except to say Cascada are possibly due some sort of jewelled hat. That is all.
(. You will note that no-one is attempting to evacuate anything, the fools.)
Not that the Cascs exist outside of things which are happening in the news. Why, most of the lyrics to this song are a spoof on the swine flu panic, only in Cascadaworld, The Music is so infectious it could actually kill someone. That's an important safety tip there, and one we should all take seriously.
In fact, the immense catchiness and aural pleasure, contained within the mutated DNA of this song - it's basically a 'Waking Up In Vegas' style riff-rocker, done on synths, with a rubbish guest rapper - act in much the same way as a vaccine does. These elements are like a little dose of some virulent pox, which your immune system can easily fight off. This then trains the white blood cells to come down hard and heavy on any future germs which find their way into your bloodstream.
So for every time you get your rave on to this, it will not only provide a thrilling backdrop to some hot dancefloor action, it will also protect you from a painful death, by some dreadful beat lurgey or other.
The next Girls Aloud single will come out, or a new Akon hit, or maybe even something by Lady GaGa, and, rather than fall prey to a sweaty fever, one which risks your very existence, you'll just smile a bit and tap one foot.
This, then, is possibly why Cascada will succeed where lesser acts fail, they're the Tamiflu of pop. Facemasks at the ready.
Download: Out now
CD Released: June 29th
91Èȱ¬ Music page
(Fraser McAlpine)
"This is hands down the best 'Just Dance' cover I've ever heard."
"The addition of a rapper does harken back to those 'he raps, she sings' songs of the 90's"
"All that is needed is for someone to create a version with sirens!"
Comment number 1.
At 2nd Jul 2009, catman231 wrote:First post boo ya!! And pretty much agree, not brill, not awful
Complain about this comment (Comment number 1)
Comment number 2.
At 2nd Jul 2009, hackerjack wrote:I like it. It doesn't fit at all with their previous stuff but it works as a one off.
Complain about this comment (Comment number 2)
Comment number 3.
At 2nd Jul 2009, spirit wrote:Cascada's latest track is a dancefloor/radio friendly number that has "hit" written all over it !
Great to dance to , with a real catchy chorus , this is a well produced slice of commercial pop !
Complain about this comment (Comment number 3)
Comment number 4.
At 2nd Jul 2009, thranjax wrote:Hello,
This is a great poppy dance tune with lyrics that are meaningless (as they should be) and utterly deranged (as you can get away with in dance music). We must be quite clear that we are evacuating everyone OFF the dancefloor, not evacuating ON the dancefloor, which could also be a symptom of horrific contagion, but would make the dancefloor slippery and quite unusable. Is that Dustin Hoffman in a chem-haz suit lurking at the back with a monkey?
Thranjax
Complain about this comment (Comment number 4)
Comment number 5.
At 3rd Jul 2009, Daniel wrote:Cascada have always been kinda in the background for me.
Their songs have provided me with some great gym beats though. I mean, you should see me go on the cross trainer when 'Everytime We Touch' comes on my iPod.
'Because the night' was also one of my favourite driving songs. I loved when it was Radio1's record of the week.
This song though, doesn't really do it for me. It just seems to be on in the background without much attention being paid.
Three Stars? I think maybe 2 and a half would cut it.
Complain about this comment (Comment number 5)
Comment number 6.
At 3rd Jul 2009, Fraser McAlpine - wrote:Are you sure? It's just I'll have to make a new graphic... ;-)
Complain about this comment (Comment number 6)
Comment number 7.
At 4th Jul 2009, spirit wrote:Ok Dan , you have supplied us with the Katy Perry pizza picture , any chance of the picture of you on a cross trainer whilst listening to Cascada ? lol
PS This song to me is well worth 3 stars , and as a commercial venture probably 4 or 5 , because to my ears this will be a huge chart and dance hit all around Europe . Trust me , it's huge , it has a big , big chorus and loads of people all around Europe are gonna love this !
Complain about this comment (Comment number 7)
Comment number 8.
At 4th Jul 2009, spirit wrote:That chorus is MASSIVE !
Complain about this comment (Comment number 8)
Comment number 9.
At 6th Jul 2009, spirit wrote:Well it's a great pop song that sounds immense in a club , but how do people feel about this song keeping Michael Jackson's Man in the mirror off number 1 ?
Complain about this comment (Comment number 9)
Comment number 10.
At 6th Jul 2009, Ss994 wrote:"This is not a good week to be trying to make an impact in the singles chart" COUGH COUGH - She's number one!!
It's mainly due to that infectous chorus, it's great!
Complain about this comment (Comment number 10)
Comment number 11.
At 6th Jul 2009, Fraser McAlpine - wrote:Yup. Hence the jewelled hat thing. As in 'crown'.
Complain about this comment (Comment number 11)
Comment number 12.
At 7th Jul 2009, CurtainJerker wrote:I generally laugh at/ignore Cascada, and in my mind they're a current-day Alice Deejay. However, this is a bit of step up in quality as far as I can tell. Not too bad for what it is.
Complain about this comment (Comment number 12)
Comment number 13.
At 7th Jul 2009, thranjax wrote:A kind of current day Wurzels without the cider. Or the combine harvester.
Complain about this comment (Comment number 13)
Comment number 14.
At 9th Jul 2009, bennyboiii wrote:I like it, the production is really good to me it has hit written all over it, it's a bit of a creeper though, so if you don't like it straight away I would suggest giving it a couple more listens. The chorus is awesome, very catchy!
Complain about this comment (Comment number 14)
Comment number 15.
At 24th Jul 2009, BloggingLiam wrote:This song should be illegal its so catchy. But I cant bring the verses to mind. I seem to put the corus to Just Dance by Gaga. Odd that.
Complain about this comment (Comment number 15)