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ChartBlog Has One Biiiig Weekend - Sunday Morning

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Fraser McAlpine | 10:40 UK time, Sunday, 11 May 2008

It's hard to believe, after all the fun and games from yesterday, that we're about to do it all again, but here I am, back in my office, covered in sun-cream, and ready to go.

Safety razorI had a quick look around the site shortly after I arrived, marvelling at the amazing clean-up job which has taken a carpet of rubbish away. But some things have been left behind, and they tell a compelling, if confusing tale. For example, can anyone think of a good reason why, in the main stage area, there should be an orange cap from a Bic single-blade safety razor? No, me neither. And actually there are four or five of them. Does this mean that the Maidstone audience were afflicted with an emergency case of five o'clock shadow? Do Madonna's audience need to be so immaculately groomed that they shave and shape their hairs mere seconds before Her Madgesty takes to the stage?

Also, there's been a quick shufty around the dressing room area, particularly the warren of trailers, dressing rooms and screens that forms The Madonna Compound. She's not there any more, obviously, although I CAN EXCLUSIVELY REVEAL that her ironing board has been left behind. Poor Lourdes and Rocco will have to go to school in creased uniforms tomorrow morning.

The other interesting thing is that this area has now been earmarked for use today, only it's so big that it has taken Nelly (and his peeps), Adele (and her peeps) Goldfrapp (peeps, peeps), and Scott Mills's new best friend Wing to use up all the space. A curiously apt combination of artists to collectively fill Madge's shoes, donchathink?

After people spend a good portion of yesterday wondering if Justin Timberlake was going to make an appearance with Madonna, today's hottest performance rumour - apart from the fact that Wing is here, obv - is that Nelly will be bringing a very special guest onstage with him. I'm told he's going to reveal all on the Chart Show at around 4:15, and hopefully that special guest will be there too. But that's all I can say right now, eexcept that it isn't Basil Brush, Although would that not be amazing?

So far, in the gap between letting everyone in and getting the acts on the stages, the biggest, most devastating hit of the entire site is, of course, the mighty Westwood. People are LOVING HIS SHIP (at least, I think that's what they're saying).

So far, the best things he has shouted from the stage are these:

"Where are you gonna take it to? Where are you gonna take it to?" - to which someone replied "where would you like me to take it to?"

and this moment ot transcendental genius

Westwood: "Where are all my independent ladies?"
Girls: "EEEEEEK!"
Westwood: "Where's all my strong, independent ladies?"
Girls: "EEEEEEK!"
Westwood: "Now SCREAM!"
Girls: "NO!"

OK, that last bit didn't happen. But he did ask for independent ladies, so by rights, it should've.

Speaking of the ladies, there's a couple of girls here who have decided to come decked out as hula girls, multi-coloured grass skirts and everything. Which is lovely and all, but if they haven't lathered on that sun-cream, they are going to BUUUURN. Trust me, I know.

Stand by for more as I get it. I'm off to get a smoothie.

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