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Rooney - 'When Did Your Heart Go Missing'

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Fraser McAlpine | 16:16 UK time, Sunday, 2 September 2007

rooney_100.jpgFACTS:
FACT ONE: Rooney are not named after the footballer.
FACT TOO: That would just be ridiculous
FACT iii: They are from the US and have been going for seven years
FACT IV: They were on the OC once but then again, who wasn't?
FACT E: They have toured with Fergie

Rooney are quite sweet chaps, really. They have nice hair, in a sort of 1970s way. You could take them home to your mum and say "Mother, this is my new boyfriend, Man From The Band Rooney" and your mum would say later "gosh, he's a lovely man, he has lovely hair -very clean".

And then you would sigh a bit inside and think 'Pete Wentz has a rigorous personal hygiene regime, Mum, but you didn't like him, did you?'

The point is, regardless of how the OC may have attempted to portray them, you just aren't going to go "MUM, DAD, I HATE YOU, I'M GOING TO GO AND HANG OUT WITH ROONEY, ONLY THEY UNDERSTAND MY FEELINGS!" because your dad probably wants to buy their new album. Whatevs, though, cus there's nothing wrong with being nice.

Rooney's niceness, though, hides their bitter, mean hearts. While you're thinking 'oh, this is jolly' and probably putting it on compilations for whatever popstar boyfriend you make out with after Man From The Band Rooney refuses to untuck his shirt one too many times, Man From The Band Rooney is getting his revenge with lyrics like "I treat you like a princess but your life is just one big mess".

You see, he had dreams of you settling down and getting married and of watching the kids play on the lawn whilst you sipped beers on the porch...Of maybe owning a couple of cows...Of domestic bliss forever with you, cus he's nice and he likes nice things and...this is really how the whole emo rock business started wasn't it? Nice boy gets hurt, writes a bitter song about it cus the nicest people have the highest expectations and he's just noticed his lovely girlfriend is actually a massive meanie who's breaking up with him. Heartless cow.

Sadly, the tune doesn't actually totally master the song and the lyrics don't quite create the bile of, say, 'Chainsmoking' by Dykehouse and the nastiest thing the hero can think to say about the girl in question is that her heart's disappeared and so the closeted despair of the whole thing is rather ineffective.

At the end of the day, it's still a nice song with a nice jaunty tune, sung by a nice man and there's still nothing wrong with that but there's nothing especially right about the whole thing, either.

Three starsDownload: Out now
CD Released:
September 3rd

(Hazel Robinson)

Comments

  1. At 08:50 AM on 02 Sep 2007, Lisa K wrote:

    Hey! This is a 5* star song not three! *v.annoyed teenage girl scowls at computer screen*

    By the way, you forgot another fact: Robert, the lead singer, played Michael in 'The Princess Diaries'.

    And they DO have very nice hair!

  2. At 10:29 AM on 02 Sep 2007, Kirsty wrote:

    eep, they're playing 'Shaking' at the start of the video - love that song :)
    This one isn't as good, but is still pretty good
    *dances*

  3. At 02:41 PM on 02 Sep 2007, Kat wrote:

    Nice review.. I like your funny, snappy ones much better than the rambling, serious ones, Hazel!

  4. At 09:27 PM on 03 Sep 2007, Emma wrote:

    ahaha i remember them from the OC

    (made them sound like Troy McClure there sorry)

    and i knew i recognised that guy from somewhere - it was the princess diaries
    thanks Lisa K

    =D

  5. At 05:55 PM on 15 Sep 2007, matt turner wrote:

    hazel hazel hazel.......i liked this one! :-D
    im sorry i didnt mean to seem meany on the gallows blog, i is sorry, it was a long night at work :-( i do like you're style hazel, you're ok, you're alright,
    love matt x

  6. At 01:42 PM on 20 Sep 2007, Sue Robinson wrote:

    I think this is a super pop tune. Another little known fact...the lead singer is Hollywood royalty. Uncle is Francis Ford Coppola and cousins are Nicolas Case and Sophia Coppola. He appeared in Princess Diaries (as stated below) but was also in Sophia Coppola's directorial debut, The Virgin Suicides.

    And the hair is fantastic!

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