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But whatever it is that you ARE doing, stop it. There is a moment of total pop genius contained within this song, and it demands your full attention and respect.

To set the scene - over a bouncy sample, taken from an old song by '60s Brit-ska pioneers the Equals, as performed by the Clash, Mr The Bizzle is telling a gripping tale from his criminal past, in which his evil car-thieving ways result in a chase across back gardens away from a police helicopter.

He's stolen a Fiat Punto, he's asked us all not to laugh at him for driving a Fiat Punto because they're an affordable car, even if all you can afford is something free, and now he's being chased by a patrol car. Naturally, this is quite a tense state of affairs, and "little Lynford" Lethal has pegged it, leaving his mate in the car to take the rap.

Here's where the good bit comes in (although, frankly, if you haven't enjoyed the story so far, you're clearly back on Facebook by now). In the story. Bizzle runs away, and his pulse is racing...so, to describe what that feels like, Bizzle raps: "Anyway, so I'm running. Heart is pumping fast, B'DMM B'DMM B'DMM B'DMM, getting tired, they're catching my arse, B'DMM B'DMM B'DMM"

OK, it's doesn't translate brilliantly into text, but trust me, that B'DMM B'DMM section is just brilliant in audio form. It's stupid, exciting, silly and evocative all at the same time, and it makes this a great song to play when you're in a huff, because it's got that rebellious edge of street hooliganism, but delivered in such a daffy way, you just can't keep the grin off your chops.

Never has petty street crime sounded so cute. Beats another blast of 50 Cent's sleazy moronica any day.

Download: Out now
CD Released: October 1th

(Fraser McAlpine)