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We are guests in their country

I have been living on the Costa Blanca now for eight years and absolutely love it. My husband left me after 40 years of married life and it filled me with anguish. I suffered a breakdown and deep depression but as we had arranged to retire to Spain I somehow gathered the strength to do it alone. The best thing I ever could have done. It was very scary at first because I had never done anything alone before, having married very young. I told myself if you are ever going to survive this, you must get out and about and meet people. I had the basics of the language which I had learned in the UK from Spanish learning tapes. Being alone at first, it was difficult to go into public places, bars and restaurants by myself, but I did it, and would recommend to anyone trying to learn the language to mix and to talk with the Spanish locals. They won't laugh at you, indeed they are delighted with you if you are trying. If you make a mistake they invariably repeat the sentence correctly, which surprisingly is a good way of learning to remember. Try to make word associations eg. when asking for help the word in Spanish is ayuda. I associated it with 'are you there' and therefore never forgot it. For those who have difficulties with their health, get an English-Spanish phrase book for medical matters. I often accompany people to the doctor in order to help with the language and bought a copy for our GP. He's tickled pink with it and has memorised many of the English complaints and diagnosis. I know it is comforting to always be with other ex-pats but try to make Spanish friends, invite them to your home to enjoy English meals. They return generous and genuine hospitality. You also have brilliant fun practising your Spanish and allowing them to practise their English. Join in the local fiestas, learn about the culture and above all treat them with respect and friendliness. That should go without saying but sadly I have found that in the eight years that I have lived here, more and more British people are moving here and loudly and aggressively declaring their dissatisfaction with Spanish people and their ways of doing things. Remember, we are guests in their country, and representatives of our own. Please don't let yourselves and your country down. Above all, enjoy yourselves and love life here as I do.

Sent by: Rosemary

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