Based on a novel by Michael Noonan, this sentimental tale of Australian orphans coming of age by the seaside has little to distinguish it except for the presence of Daniel Radcliffe, occasional boy wizard and fulltime superstar. He plays the oldest in a quartet of boys uprooted from their grey convent existence for a Christmas holiday in a tatty little beach hamlet. There, they vie to be adopted by a hairy biker and his childless French wife.
The nominal hero of this story is Misty (Lee Cormie), a sensitive and bespectacled lad who immediately bonds with Sullivan Stapleton's troubled motorcyclist, and embarks on an elaborate campaign to become the perfect son. Meanwhile, the other boys seem to be more concerned with boyish things like fishing - the bay is home to a mythically uncatchable sea creature called Henry - and spying on the local leggy saucepot (Teresa Palmer). For Radcliffe's taciturn virgin, this relationship quickly goes beyond voyeurism, and before you can say "teenage fantasy figure" she's teaching him the sexual ropes in her comfy cliff-top hideaway.
"NEEDS MORE SUBSTANCE"
It's all thoroughly traditional, right down to the world-weary voice-over that narrates the story in flashback, and the kooky Aussie eccentrics on the sidelines. The acting from kids and adults alike is serviceable; Radcliffe manages a pretty convincing Australian accent, while Stapleton is pleasantly growly as a bargain bucket Russell Crowe, complete with leather jacket and bad attitude. December Boys isn't a poor film as such, but this brand of rheumy-eyed nostalgia needs a lot more substance to be memorable.
December Boys is out in the UK on 14th September 2007.