Well, this is it!
It's time for me to say goodbye and to thank you all for being such a wonderful bunch. You've been unfailingly kind, unerringly helpful, and unbelievably quick in responding to our calls for action. In short, it has been nothing but a pleasure writing for you and I hope I was able to return the favour.
Until next time...
Yours truly,
The Mole
After the show tonight, the cast and crew will be having a wrap party and dancing til dawn. (Or midnight, depending on how our energy levels are after three weeks of live TV) Of course I would love to invite you all to join us... but I'm not going to. We've only budgeted for about twelve packets of crisps, six dips, and a couple of lager shandies so I'm not sure there'd be enough to go around. Plus, I'm not sure there's room in the pub for all three and a half million of you.
"Good morning everybody," says Alex, today's producer, "and welcome to the final show."
It is too much to bear and Kate immediately starts crying. She falls to the floor, gnashing her teeth and ripping at her clothes. Chris sits in stunned silence, a single tear falling down his stony face. Martin dabs at his eyes with his silken locks, like a modern day .
After two weeks in deepest darkest Essex, being given the run around by some badgers that were very good at hiding, Gordon Buchanan made it to still in one piece. So what was it with those elusive badgers, I asked him?
Looking grizzly and unshaven (and ever so slightly older than when he started) Gordon started at the beginning:
"It's been a bit of a struggle, but we're almost there," says Roger, today's producer, and that's exactly how it feels. There are only two days left until the end of the series and Portacabin fever seems to have kicked in.
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