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Crippled Monkey | 00:00 UK time, Tuesday, 20 April 2004

Look, don't get me wrong, it's not that I'm obsessed with sex. Because I'm not, really. It's just that these minor league celebrities will keep getting up to - well, you know - in disabled toilets. And invariably I find them 'at it' when I've had a few pints and am desperate to answer a call of nature.



Jodie Marsh

The latest dubious celeb to have indulged in such depraved practices is TV star (well, that's what it says here) Jodie Marsh. You can read the whole story in the newspaper (although if you're young and impressionable, please don't click on the link). Apparently Jodie and her 'friend' may have used the sink at one point - remember that the next time you go to wash your hands before leaving.

If you're a celebrity who's done unmentionable things in a disabled toilet, why not drop me a line and explain your reasons for making a fit-to-burst crip wait outside? On second thoughts - don't.

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