Paper Monitor
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
In journalism school, one of the things the little cubs learn about is the "drop intro".
Rather than simply come out in the first line and tell everybody what's going on, the drop intro generates suspense for a paragraph or two.
The acknowledged masters of the art have always worked at the Daily Mail. As far as drop intros go, they are a Power Rangers-style hybrid of Yoda, Mr Miyagi and Roger Federer in his pomp.
Take the beautiful example on page three of today's publication:
"With its cuddly toys and equally cuddly presenters, Play School appeared the epitome of innocent children's entertainment."
Lordy, what horror is about to unexpectedly unfold? Paper Monitor hasn't felt like this since the box bit in Seven.
Put us out of our misery, drop masters. Please.
"Yet a careful look behind the round, square and arched windows would have apparently revealed clouds of marijuana smoke."
Now Paper Monitor can unclench.
And then flicking through the next few pages, you see there's a lot of droppage about.
Elsewhere, in the Sun, there's a classic example of the Currant Bun's features style.
The release of Sacha Baron Cohen's The Dictator prompts with a false beard and take two models in khaki and berets on an impromptu tour of London.
The amusement is not to be derived from the text, but merely from the fact they did it at all.