Paper Monitor
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
Paper Monitor feels reborn. It is no longer the most miserable day of the year, at least as far as the Canary Islands Tourist Board is concerned.
And as an antidote to Monday's gloom, Tuesday has brought a host of uplifting stories.
The Daily Mail offers the promise of summertime street parties, of neighbours coming together to eat sticky buns over Union Jack-bedecked trestle tables, by announcing that Kate Middleton's parents have: " in their sights."
Apparently, the couple have been guests at a private shooting party on the Queen's Scottish estate, in the "clearest sign yet that Kate and Prince William are poised to announce their engagement".
If royal occasions aren't your thing then turn to the front page of the Independent, where there is the promise of
Pills or powders cold could be on the market within a decade, thanks to a breakthrough by scientists in Cambridge, it says.
Paper Monitor thought it could not get any better on seeing page three of the Daily Express, headlined:"Mia-ouch!".
Royal Mail staff have got themselves in a flap about a cat attacking their posties.They are refusing to put mail through the letter box behind which Lana, the 18-month-old tortoiseshell, lurks in wait.
But even Paper Monitor's love for a good funny animal tale was topped by a funny shaped vegetable, courtesy of the Daily Mirror:
Gardener Stuart Boulton was toe-tally amazed - after Stuart has already popped it in a pot to make soup. He said: "It was delicious... and it didn't taste a bit sweaty."
To satisfy the more sceptical readers, Mr Boulton even pictures his own foot alongside his prized vegetable, complete with five root-like digits.
Enough frivolity, however, because there are some important Poppy Watch developments to report.
The Times has joined the party, albeit in an understated way. As if to distinguish itself from the Daily Telegraph, which started the week by wearing a huge emblem alongside its masthead, it has pinned the tiniest of poppies to its lapel. Full marks for giving it two leaves and wearing the stalk at a jaunty angle, mind.
But wait, the Telegraph's flower has disappeared completely. What has gone wrong? Has this most traditional of papers turned its back on the UK's armed forces? Were its sub-editors so disgusted at the front-page story reporting the SAS may have to take orders from the French that they tore it from the front in disgust?
Or did the staff simply suffer from Paper Monitor's annual difficulty - the poppy that drops off on public transport, leaving a solitary pin destined to pierce the chest at any available opportunity?
Perhaps, they could take a leaf from Simon Cowell's book. As the Mail reports, the X Factor judge has been
The £84.99 brooch is one of a number of designer emblems being sold in aid of the Royal British Legion. Paper Monitor will probably stick to the normal version. At the rate they get lost, it could end up being a very expensive year.