Your Letters
Re : I always give aggressive tailgaters a quick back-off squirt when they're a few inches off my bumper - the fact that I may also be giving them Legionnaires Disease is just a bonus.
Sue, London
Imagine my disappointment at clicking on and it being about tennis. I was hoping for a story about someone being battered by a fish at Buckingham Palace.
Andy Nichols, London
I was hoping he'd been called to Buckingham Palace for a quick slap with a haddock.
Jinja, Edinburgh
I can't see why . God forbid that anyone try anything a bit different, eh? Let's just stick to Abide With Me and the like.
Jane Callaghan
I have been all for trying to appreciate the way South Africa is showing passion, but am genuinely missing the operatic highs and lows that only human sighs and cheer can produce. Without the singing from the terraces, it is 90 minutes of the beautiful game scored in the key of same pitch irritancy.
Jake Williams
During this time of World Cup fever, might I point out that the correct expression is, "Come on, England!" as opposed to, "Come on England!", which means something else entirely.
Kate Davey, London, UK
Oh! Is the World Cup happening? Surely someone should have mentioned something...
MD, Southsea Hampshire
Having spotted this headline in the "most read" list - - how many others were similarly disappointed that this didn't involve jangling bling, a cigar and a silver tracksuit? Surely the obvious addition to the cabinet to help fix Britain's problems...
Fi, Gloucestershire, UK
. If it didn't, would it be a seagull?
Nuno Aragao, Aveiro, Portugal
Does the opening sentence of make any sense to you guys?
Liam, Northampton
Dressed as mermaids (last photo in )? That would be the rare two-legged, non-fishtailed mermaid that seems to have escaped everyone's attention until now, then?
Dr Reece Walker PhD, London
Seeing as Monitor is familiar with 3rd and Bird (Friday letters), I am urging him/her to do the muffin. Shake, shake, the muffin!
Sharon, Nailsea, UK
Monitor note: Wicky wicky.