Your Letters
Just to bring up the old debate, Paper Monitor doesn't understand that a decent handbag is worth 300 quid, but wants its initials in its privet. So is definitely a man, just a very well-groomed one...
The Bob, Glasgow
A poster with the slogan "Keep Calm and Carry On" is selling like hot cakes. In my considerable experience, not only has no-one I know ever bought a hot cake, but I wouldn't know where to buy one if I wanted one. Should we not therefore use a more apposite simile to describe fast-selling goods? Such as "selling like items carrying the slogan Keep Calm and Carry On"?
John Whapshott, Westbury, Wiltshire
"If somebody stands up and says 'sorry, I can't serve you if you can't speak English', then they'll think twice" (). I really don't think they will. They'll think, "what did he just say?"... but in their native language.
Kat Murphy, Coventry
Unusual bird seen in ? Are you on some kind of bonus scheme?
Jackie, Ilford
Why not change your "Send us a Letter" area on your website, and force people to select a subject heading from a drop-down list-box - eg letters, caption comp, porridge... this way you have just one portal for the e-mails, which can go to different e-mail accounts your end, and will prevent the weekly aneurisms caused by keyboard silliness. I'll do it for you, but you might have to pay for my trip in.
Rachel, Minnetonka
Monitor note: There are indeed a great man captions clogging up the mailbox. All of which have been summarily binned.