Paper Monitor
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
There's palpable disappointment at Paper Monitor Towers that the Daily Express seems to have overlooked the story about drummers having the stamina of top footballers thanks to the aerobic workout of the job. So it's a missed opportunity that Express owner Richard Desmond - the man who keeps the beat behind the RD Crusaders (cf) - isn't called upon to write about his passion. Maybe tomorrow.
Meanwhile, the Times is making deep in-roads into Telegraph territory with a story about troubles at the "Sloane Rangers' favourite store" - the General Trading Company, near London's Sloane Square. There's even a sidebar from a Times hack who had her wedding list at the shop, and seems to be ruing the imminent disappearance of leather pigs(interrobang) and nice boys from minor public schools.
Paper Monitor can almost hear Telegraph columnist Camilla Pashmina gnashing her teeth... not at being scooped by the paper's rival, you understand, but at the ugly portents for retail therapy in this time of crunched credit.
Lastly, all the talk may be about Batman at the moment, but the Sun knows that if there's one superhero who will appeal to kids these days it's not the Caped Crusader - it's the one man be-goggled Icelandic anti-obesity ambassador Sportacus, aka Magnus Scheving. Under the banner, "Sportacus writes for the Sun", Scheving offers some inspiration for how to keep kids busy over the hols.
Sample advice: "Even when it's wet, get outdoors. There's no such thing as bad weather, just the wrong clothes."
Beat that Christian Bale.