Paper Monitor
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
Having been lured onto a social networking site that shall remain nameless for once, Paper Monitor has recently been tickled by assorted quizzes that identify which Heroes/Sopranos/Star Wars/Simpsons character you are most like.
The Daily Telegraph appears to enjoy the same pastime (although it has yet to accept Paper Monitor's friend request), as today it applies the same idea to costume drama. "Are you Sense or Sensibility? Try our quiz."
Sample questions include:
"A possible suitor is 35-years-old. You think he is:
a) Wise, interesting and kind, with much to commend him
b) Far too ancient, feeble and infirm at that age to be interested in romance
c) He's a man. What's not to like?
"You are trapped at a party where you find the other people embarrassing and vulgar. How do you behave?
a) Utter amiable lies to keep the conversation going
b) Refuse to make small talk and leave the room
c) Embarrassing and vulgar? What do you mean? I haven't laughed so much for ages..."
Answered mostly As? Stoic Elinor. Mostly Bs? Impulsive Marianne. Mostly Cs? Punorama and Caption Comp.
Finally a word of praise where it's due. In Paper Monitor's younger years, the most keenly awaited cultural treat would have been the big Christmas Day film or comedy. But no more. Nowadays it's the Economist Christmas/New Year double edition.
If you've never sampled its fine menu, unfortunately you're out of luck for this year - any remaining copies will probably have been removed from newsagents' shelves this morning. But if you have dined at the fine restaurant of the mind that is the Christmas Double, you'll realise that the world is an endlessly fascinating place in which silk purses are just waiting to be sewn from unlikely ears.
For instance, who could have guessed that the story of a Scandinavian match magnate could have been such a gripping read? Who has ever paused to think about why kitchens are the way they are? What, exactly, is the history of the shopping mall and would you have known how interesting it was? And aren't piers great? Well yes, they are.
Having finished this year's edition in the bath last night, one's brain feels nourished and enlivened and so much better for a healthy diet.
There are two things Paper Monitor really loves about the Economist. One is its effortless knack of not making you feel stupid when it explains stuff. So for instance it says: "In the year to August 2007, IKEA, a Swedish furniture chain, sold over 1m kitchens worldwide." In case you didn't know what Ikea is, now you do and you're not made to feel like a loser. This can be very useful when the same technique is applied to consultants, accountants, analysts and other organisations not normally named in your cutlery drawer.
The other is that it seduces you into reading a story, only later dropping in the detail which makes it newsworthy. Any wannabe journalists out there - don't think this is the way to get on in journalism. It's 100% NOT the way British journalists are trained. They are exhorted at every turn and at all costs to emphasise what is NEW. The Economist does things differently, and for that, Paper Monitor gives thanks to the magic guiding hand in the sky.