Paper Monitor
Today's Independent carries perhaps the most downbeat poster-front in its history. Its foot-and-mouth coverage kicks off with a photo of a sign bearing the terrifying legend "Institute for Animal Health Pirbright Laboratory".
Paper Monitor is quivering with ill-suppressed fear. A much better job of scaring the general public can be found over in the Daily Mail.
You can't beat a headline that reads "Smallpox. Plague. The timebombs in our labs" for setting you up for a week of not panicking over a farm disease that does not affect humans. Chew on that Indy sandal-wearers.
And there's an outing for a great old cliche of journalese in the Mail with its headline "Farmers' fury as the world slaps a ban on food from Britain". Slaps a ban? Sounds painful. And it's a term with a great pedigree, with the OED listing its debut in newspapers as an appearance in a 1976 edition of the Milton Keynes Express.
Over in the Guardian, there's a headline to give nightmares to Lord Coe. "After 180 million years, first 2012 Olympic venue is ready for action." It's a full page dedicated to Weymouth, a venue for sailing in the games. The entire geological development of the south coast has been working towards 2012. Or so the Guardian says.
There is more Great White Silly Season Stuff (henceforth GWSSS) in the Daily Express with a report of a sighting of one of the whopper sharks off Tarragona near Barcelona. There is a picture of a shark from said species showing its displeasure at being the subject of a paparazzo "snatch pic".