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16:15 UK time, Wednesday, 6 September 2006

Your story about the USSR in the Cold War asks "?" Exactly, why aren't they eating porridge???
Tim, UK

Re Paper Monitor's thoughts on "xxx is the new Diana". Is this the new "X is the new Y"?
Edward Higgins, Plumstead

Fantastic puns! Finally, a whole host of puns that are both cringeworthy, funny and relevant! And no bloody Mary Poppins songs...
Robin, Edinburgh

. If ever there was a gift to a Monitor letter-writer, that's it: "I never knew he was lost"... "What do you mean, nearly?"... "That's one MP facing reselection then"... or maybe you mean another microbe responsible for dozens of deaths each day?
Jel, Swansea

Phil, a real statistician wouldn't dream of correcting you if you were wrong (Tuesday letters). He'd just say that you are probably wrong.
Adam, London, UK

Linguists will squabble about the plural of gin and tonic till the cows come home (Tuesday letters). Both "gins and tonic" and "gin and tonics" are syntactically acceptable solutions because it is a binomial collocation not a composite noun. The aim should always be to reduce ambiguity - don't say two gins and tonics unless you want four drinks.
PJ, Aberdeen, UK

Re . There was (and maybe still is) a van in Aberdeen that says "This van is driven by a blind man" - it is, of course, owned by a Venetian blind company. Comedy gold.
Robin, Edinburgh

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